we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
