hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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