this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
