Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
