just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
