if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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