So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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