It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
