Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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