our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
