you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
