You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Randomize
