If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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