the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Randomize
