thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
