what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
