I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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