Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
