Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
