hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
