I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
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