what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
