is your mom at the bar?
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Randomize
