were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
