it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I will be naked everywhere
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
