Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
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