Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
