Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.

(615): View more from Tennessee

Heaven soaked bacon.

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(607): View more from New York

I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.

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(419): View more from Ohio

somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...

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(970): View more from Colorado

just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays

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(703): View more from Virginia

My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday

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(512): View more from Texas

You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it

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(631): View more from New York

I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!

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