i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
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