ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize