U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
