Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
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