Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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