the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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