Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
