Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
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