People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
