ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
