Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
