Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I cannot find my penis.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
