You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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