I like my sex mixed with concussions.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Randomize
