yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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