so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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