I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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