Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
