I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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