I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
