he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Randomize
