I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
